At Least 2 Florida Newspapers are Apparently Dropping Andy Marlette's Cartoon Strip

 

I read this morning that at least 2 Florida Newspapers are dropping the Sunday edition of Andy Marlette's cartoon strip.  One of them is in Gainesville, very near where Marlette is from.  Panama City is dropping both the daily edition of Marlette's comic and the Sunday version as well.

I don't read the comics regularly--and I never thought his Florida themed cartoon was funny.  Obviously I am not a fan of Marlette--a guy who's done dozens of cartoons of me --inappropriately insinuating I am a racist--while he, himself, is the white, entitled liberal that uses the N-word in his cartoons.  Several news outlets reported on this use of the N-word and his misogynistic attack on female staffers of the Governor a few years back.  Really sickening stuff.  Gannett just swept these scandals under the rug though--I mean he makes them money in his syndication, right?  Plus, he unmercifully and disgustingly attacked President Trump over and over and over for years on end while issuing all Democrats a pass--so this earned him a lot of "street-cred" with Gannett and other liberals who looked past and ignored his use of the "N-Word."  Ho hum is what they said then.

Meanwhile, if his Florida themed cartoon isn't making it in Florida now--I wonder what that means for it's chances elsewhere?

I wonder what happened there?

Pimp & Twits Part I: Croc Goes Ballistic! (a *Parody)

The Setup:

A long time ago, in the sleepy, swampy southern Florida town of Patronville, our protagonist, Croc (also frequently and affectionately known as "Pimp" for the special way he treats his acquaintences, business partners and friends) sits alone in his darkened office overlooking the bay.  He recently returned from a disastrous trip to Belize where an experimental anti-aging and cosmetic procedure that was supposed to cut 30 years off of his appearance and add 50 years of longevity to his lifespan went horribly, badly wrong.  Instead of the machine utilizing the DNA of the crocodile to accomplish this miracle feat--the scientist at the controls made an error which left our character disfigured;  he came out of the chamber a crocadile/human hybrid (not unlike Jeff Goldblum in "The Fly"--except worse... ) Upon returning to Patronville--he was assured by his loyal, obsequious assistants Maya and Phaedra, that he didn't "look that bad....."  So being in a sullen, saddend state due to his reptillian appearance, his anger suddenly intensifies......As he reads an article on an unrelated topic in the Patronville Observer Sentinal ("POS", for short) , he realizes that yes-- to his utter anger and dismay--- that he, himself, personally, has been mentioned in an unflattering light in an unrelated article written by Andy, a dimwitted, untalented writer on the "POS" staff.

PIMP: (Yelling)   Phaedra!!! Maya!!!

PHAEDRA AND MAYA IN UNISON:  "Yes sir, how can we serve you, how can we make your day outstanding, meaningful, and fantastic sir!"

PIMP: "Get me the POS's  Lisa on the @#$$%%& phone right now!!!"

PHAEDRA AND MAYA IN UNISON:  "Yes sir!!"

PIMP: "Do it now @##$$%%%  why are you standing there looking dumb!!!"

(---speakerphone on the desk rings......ring,   ring,  ring,)    

LISA--(through the speakerphone:)  "It's a great day at the P-O-S--how can I help......"

PIMP: --cutting her off  "It's me, Croc--cut the #$%&.  Why the #$%&*  F*&% is my name in your POS paper today?!?!?  What is that #$%%&* Andy thinking?? We know he's a dimwitted idot--but what is this??  And why the #$%& would you allow that??!!

LISA:  "Sorry sir, we're just trying to..."

PIMP: --cutting her off  "I don't give a #$%& what your're trying to do, I don't care what you think, and I don't want to EVER see my name in any unflattering negative light ever--in your POS paper.  Do you understand me?  NEVER!!  You know that, we have discussed this many times.  Never me, never negative, only positive!!  What the #$%& Lisa??

LISA:  "Sorry sir, but..."

PIMP: --cutting her off  "Just shut up.  Nothing you say means anything, I've told you that.  Don't you #$$%&* make me come down there, don't make me do it!!  It is almost 3:00--you know what happens at 3:00--- and I will be down there and you don't want that, understand me??"  

LISA:  "Sorry sir, terribly sorry....no, don't come down, please, let me manage this sir.  I am a POSemployee, and Andy is a POS employee, so technically...."

PIMP: --cutting her off  " You are both POS employeess, but don't forget the money I spend with your

Two Editorial Cartoons in One Weekend!!

 

Andy Marlette Shamelessly plugs his stupid, non-humorous comic strip, Pimp & Twits, at the Pensacola Beach Air Show July 10, 2021--with the same predictably disastrous results as PNJ's news, editorial, and features output and as equally dismal as PNJ's feeble attempts at subscriber growth and retention.....it all just ends in a fiery mid-air disaster......

Wow! PNJ Editorial Cartoonist Andy "Dandy" Marlette and the crack 2-person editorial PNJ team have been  busy little beavers this weekend, once again on the attack, lashing out at the hard working Escambia Board of County Commissioners.  We got two (2) cartoons this weekend, one on Saturday and one this morning.

Andy must be really, really lathered up and exercised to take a "Sunday" slot (the only day PNJ has any circulation over 200 readers) and pivot away from Trump, Rubio, Scott, and DeSantis---to attack us!

It's amusing

But the smaller and smaller number of subscribers PNJ clings on to must be wondering what his anger and venom is all about.  Around town at various social events I attend, I'm always asked "Wow, the cartoonist is always after you--what's up with that?" to which I simply respond, "He's an idiot, he is glib, everyone knows it, and I live rent-free in his head."

So yes, I understand Andy hates those of us that roll up our sleeves and do the difficult yet necessary (and often messy) work of local governance --work he himself couldn't do and couldn't handle---yes, we all get that.  Yes, yes we know he has a fixation on the BCC and yours truly in particular.   Yes we know he has been drawing cartoons about us that are stupid for years now, and yes we know he makes some money for the failing PNJ with his syndicated cartoons which help keep the PNJ financially viable.  (He punched his ticket by attacking former president Trump mercilessly over the last 5 years--which gave him "the creds", apparently, to have a nationally syndicated comic strip given to him--from which he more than likely makes a few bucks).  He uses the N-Word in his cartoons, so what says his employer?   It's not like he's someone that should get cancelled like the Bachelor host, right?  Yes, he hates Trump, makes money for the liberal PNJ, runs a recurring schtick that he's a "Republican" (yeah, right), and does as he is told by his local advertisers---- so they, in turn, ignore that messy piece of nastiness about Andy Marlette, a privileged white man who used the N-Word and flipped the finger to those who wanted to cancel him.  Apparently, he is untouchable unlike so many others who got cancelled for doing the same.  So, yes, PNJ keep him around because of that.  He's nothing but a useful tool.  For the money, and because he does the Patron's bidding unflinchingly.

But when he makes stupid cartoons about me and what I do, I'll continue to manipulate them and make them actually funny.  He really hates that which is also very amusing.  It drives him nuts but he can't do a damn thing about it!   So.............

Introducing "Pimp & Twits"

Introducing "Pimp & Twits!"

And now, with all of this ruckus in the backdrop--- stay tuned for a brand new, actually funny "cartoon" strip of my own based upon Andy's failing, stupid one that nobody reads and that isn't funny.  My version will be titled "Pimp & Twits"  ---Set in the fictional, Florida coastal fishing town known as "Patronville" Starring a meth-addicted, media-obsessed Crocadile who is actually a former human being known as El Patron ---but  who was tragically transformed into a Crocadile/human hybrid in a life-extending, youth enhancing plastic surgery procedure that went haywire in lab in Belize. In addition to becoming a crocodile, his mind became warped and he suddenly, genuinely believed he was loved by all, respected by everybody, and that all people would do his bidding universally. Surrounding the croc, affectionately known as "Pimp"(because he "pimps" everyone around him to do his bidding)  are his cast of cronies that run his deals and his games for him.....  Lisa and Andy, two simpletons that love to dress up like characters from Hogan's Heroes and play-act scenes from that 60's  show, two dimwitted